Give Yourself Permission to Experience Alzheimer's Disease Fully

One of the things I found most difficult about my experience with Alzheimer's disease, was that I often found myself denying or trying to ignore my feelings in an effort to feel better. The consequences of this avoidance, was that I actually felt worse without even being aware of it. I thought, that if I could ignore what I was feeling and not acknowledge it, it would somehow go away.

The avoidance of my feelings resulted in the avoidance of spending time with my mother in law. I had many great excuses like; I was too busy with work, or had too many family responsibilities, or she wouldn't remember whether I was there or not, or I didn't have enough time. The list would go on! But if I was being honest with myself, I was trying to avoid the pain and grief that I was feeling as a result of  losing the person that I once knew.

Through some of the soul searching work that I have been doing, I have come to understand that the only way out of pain and suffering is through it. You can't go around it, you can't avoid it, you can't pretend it doesn't exist. Well, I suppose you can but all those techniques will fuel the pain rather than ease it.  The only way out of pain and suffering is to embrace it like a close friend. Acknowledge it's there, give it a name, feel it fully and allow yourself to experience it without judging whether it's good or bad.

As painful as it is, being authentic and honest about your feelings will enable you to move beyond the pain and suffering and experience Alzheimer's disease more peacefully. If you're the kind of person who avoids feeling some of these difficult or uncomfortable emotions, perhaps, Alzheimer's disease has come into your life to help you grow.  As August Gold so eloquently stated: "To enter the conversation of life we have only to change one key word: We have to stop asking why this is happening to me and start asking why it is happening for me?"

Today, try to be honest about your feelings and feel the pain and suffering that may be in your life. Give yourself permission to embrace what you're feeling. Are you honest with your feelings? Do you embrace the good feelings as well as the ones that aren't so pleasant? What lessons can we learn from Alzheimer's disease?